2003-05-11 - 1:17 a.m.

I worked 10-nearly 1 this morning. Then we went to Danville where I only bought shoes, not pants. The one pair of pants they had in my size horribly didn’t fit. So then we wandered back to town, and I went in to work again. I worked from around 6ish to close tonight. I didn’t want to close, but I didn’t want Nathan to have to be there all night because no one else knows how.

There I go, all caring again. I should stop that, since no one else cares either.

Tomorrow, I start my other job. I really hope it doesn’t work out so I can go back to being with the shining stars of Monical’s. Fucking hell. I enjoy mornings so much that nights seem fucking impossible. I mean, yeah, it’s hard getting up the morning. But it’s totally worth it not to have to deal with these girls that have holier than thou attitudes suddenly. You don’t tell managers you won’t do something unless something’s *wrong* with you. Like me. I don’t do much lifting. I can if I have to. But I generally try to avoid it.

I don’t know. I mean, the money would be pretty cool. Some spending money (Monical’s paycheck) and some saved money (Viskase paycheck). The saved money is being saved for when I’m a broke college student. But factory work really isn’t for me. I’ve always been told that. I guess I’ll never learn.

Thinking - “You know what I think about when I'm this close to another body? I think one day, at one moment, this body that I'm holding in my arms will stop breathing, stop living, just... stop.”

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